Daphne Selfe in Furry White Coat

It Was An Extraordinary Thing To Happen At 70

A Modelling Life

Recently, I’ve been thinking a bit deeper about the extraordinary thing that happened to me at 70 years old.  Did I think of myself as having a modelling life?  Not really, I’ve always done some modelling over the years and it’s been a big part of who I am but other things in my life such as being a wife and model took precedence.

For the majority of my life I’ve lived as a normal person going about my life in my English Market Town slightly north of my much loved London and continue you to do so.

As an adventurer by nature I do like to try new things and grasp opportunities so when I received the call to ‘walk’ for the hip young fashion house Red or Dead at London Fashion Week in 1998 I immediately said ‘Yes’. But that didn’t stop me thinking whether it was too soon after the recent death of my husband Jim from his third stroke, ending 43 years of married life? Did they really want me at 70 years of age? Could I still do it? I decided I had to give it a go as what did I have to loose? Only my pride if I made a fool of myself!

Looking back I can see that this one event was where I crossed an imaginary threshold and stepped into a new life for myself and a defining moment for the Western World and it’s attitude to ageing. I went against convention and society norms. Me, a woman well past her prime and sell by date, so it is said and we’ve all come to accept without a fight.

My reward was a feature in Vogue, the top high fashion and lifestyle magazine and a signing to Models 1: Europe’s leading modelling agency. But more than this I felt acknowledged, seen, independent, beautiful and successful. I was excited to see if this might be fun for a few weeks and months and then things would go back as before – on that I was wildly mistaken!

Now 17 years on, of worldwide modelling which shows no sign of slowing down (with another big campaign due out shortly) I’ve seen friends and acquaintances ‘fade away’, loose their confidence and vitality. Stop caring about their appearance all together and lose their unique sparkle. This saddens me and it doesn’t have to be this way.

What I’ve realised is most of us don’t even know this has happened, let alone know the steps to change it. Have you looked in the mirror and wondered ‘where did I go’? I believe we are in a time where we can change convention and I can help. And I want to help. Let’s make a stand together and go against longheld beliefs with renewed hope whether you are young or old (set an example for our children and grandchildren too).

The solutions have always been here and with my long experience I want to strip away the negative beliefs and assumptions. Let’s get back to a more joyful, natural, realistic, loving and ageless way of seeing and experiencing ourselves and those around us.

Change Yourself – Change The World

The World Needs You Vital, Confident, Bright & Beautiful

Join  me if you want to be part of this journey by signing up to Daphne News and do leave a comment below as I’d love to hear from you if you agree and what you’d like changed the most.

Two weeks now until the Daphne Selfe Academy 2016 starts and there are a few spaces left to join our international group of students that stretches right around the world.  Enrolment closing on Saturday 20th February at 12:00 GMT. Learn more at:- www.daphneselfe.com/academy/

#beyourownselfe

Valentine's Shoot 1999 a modelling life
Valentine’s Shoot 1999

6 thoughts on “It Was An Extraordinary Thing To Happen At 70”

  1. Yes, I totally agree it doesn’t matter how old you are it’s what’s inside that counts but always take pride in your appearance. An interest in fashion, hair and make-up are not just for the young! If you look good you feel good!

  2. Ms.Daphne Selfe, you are such a brilliant light! I eagerly await your genius and revolutionary posts, such as this one on creating an entirely new context on aging. Thank you for being brave and positive and believing in all possibilities which many of us lose when we are shuttled back in our tiny corner by the majority and expected to act our age and give up. Please keep showing us the way to step out, forge on and teach us how to believe we can create a tremendous new space for the rest of our lives and figure out and own our “beauty” and worth. Thank you again for your fabulous vision.

  3. Thank you Barbara this is wonderful feedback to receive thank you so much. I like it “an entirely new context on ageing” let’s never give up or give in – be fabulous and enjoy life!

  4. You are a delight and I have come to cherish the thoughts you send out to us. A world in which marriages last decades rather than meer moments would see stability for our children and a return to family values. Having read how you managed to pick yourself up after the loss of your husband and find reason to live: then I shall use your example to pull myself free from depression and strive for a future once again… Hope is priceless and you have afforded that to me. Thank you!

  5. Thank you so much Dominic for your words and if I’ve given you hope that is a great reward indeed. There is much to look forward too and if I can be of any use that is wonderful.

  6. Dear Daphne, by incident I found you and your website. Now I have been reading a lot of what you wrote and like it so much. You are such a wise and strong woman and a beautiful woman too. But the most emotional was today, when I read about you and your husband and your words “The world needs you vital, confident, bright & beautiful”. That put tears into my eyes, because last year my love passed away and I am so sad and don´t know who I am at the moment and how to be a “normal” living human ever again (please excuse my bad english, I´m writing from germany). But your words and your living give hope to me, just like the man called Dominic wrote before. So I will try to find my way, whatever it may be. Thank you so much for beeing such an inspiration and all the best to you!!

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